Its dark and cold. The snow melts under my feet; seeping into my shoes. I really shouldn’t be out this late but I couldn’t help it. The stars are so beautiful this time of night, especially from my viewpoint on the roof. Everybody has gone to sleep for the day leaving only the streetlights on, well except from Mr. Davis who never sleeps. But the lights were not the only thing I wanted to see. It was Christmas and so I sat here waiting for Santa. Waiting in the snow.
I was alone in the forest, no one around for miles upon miles. The scents of acorn and redwood filled my nostrils. I saw varying shades of green all around me; like a beautiful landscape drawing. I was aware of their presence, of their emotions, of their life. I finally did it; I understood the trees.
I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. I sit here waiting, pondering if I’ve made the right decision. I did make it in all seriousness but now that I look back I’m not sure that I made the right call. So I remain here; thinking.
The water wasn’t too cold, neither was it all that hot. It was a perfect lukewarm; the perfect temperature for relaxing. I stood on the reef for a while before getting in; watching the perfect purples of the sunset. When the sun finally fell, I jumped in and took a dip in the ocean.
I had met her in a bar, and to be honest I didn’t think much of her at first glance. Sure she was easy on the eyes but she wasn’t exactly ‘hot’. So I was moving on, at least until my drunk friend Mike dared me to a bet. He thought I couldn’t get anyone’s number so I agreed and took him up on his bet.
Now there were many other people I would have rather chosen but I was playing things safe and now I’m glad I did. If not for that bet how would I ever know the beauty that Ruth was? How would I ever know the joy of seeing her smile? How would I know the pleasure I get from just being by her side? From telling her that I love her? From knowing that she loved me back?
Now, today was my wedding day and a confused Mike my best man (cheers Mike). But the joy was not seeing her walk down the aisle (though that was a pretty close second). The joy was after the party, after the formalities, after all the hassles of getting married; looking lovingly into her eyes and her looking lovingly into mine, and we both knowing that we were going to be partners for life.
I don’t know when this all happened, when the earth went into ruins, but I do know that it was our fault. All the efforts we used to become more ‘civilised’ only damage the earth and by the end, it couldn’t sustain us anymore. Karma came back like a loan shark, and the whole world felt the pain.
The acid rain was first, destroying most of our water supplies. Then came the first wave of earthquakes. After that it was peaceful for a while, we thought it was over. We tried to see if we could escape of fix the planet. It was too late for neither.
The second wave of earthquakes wiped out those that were left. Only those who knew where to hide managed to come out alive, if only just barely. Now as I lie here, legs broken, I’m staring at something I’ve never seen before. Tidal waves bigger than the Everest are coming at me; past miles upon miles of dessert. And as I reach my end I do the only logical thing; I tremble.
The metal was hard; not the way I wanted it to be. It wasn’t behaving as it should. I had tried my best but it was worthless; it was a failure. Still I did not give up, I had failed before and I will fail again but by the same stroke, I had succeeded before and I would do so again. I was no foreigner to pain, no stranger to defeat; I’ve had my fair share of losses. But I was my own critic, I knew what I had to do to get better. After all, I was my own best friend and my own worst judge.